Monday, March 29, 2010

Can't believe you're gone ..

Death is not losing a loved one, but gaining an angel..
To the fighter you were, Yash.

You were a true fighter, battling your way through life with that smile on your face,
Always wanting to spread joy wherever you went.
You’ll always be etched in our memories.
We miss you, already.

I lost my friend to cancer yesterday evening. Since then I’ve just been too filled with questions. I know my take on life at this point of time would come across as something very cynical but that’s exactly what I’m feeling now.

Life is nothing but a bloody struggle. All everyone does all their lives is run. You’re running behind something or the other. And what are we running so hopelessly behind? Money! There’s no time to wait and have fun. No, life’s certainly not a party!
The first half of your life is spent studying. One exam gets over, it leads to the other. And then you look for jobs. Some get it, some don’t. If job’s not an issue, marriage is. Your marriage is on the rocks or you're just too busy showing you're happy when you're not. And then you have a kid. The kid has his own set of problems. If nothing else, someone is detected with some horrible disease or some unexpected incident occurs which just turns your life upside down. What the fuck. What’s the point of all this! Everybody dies at the end. Period.
What made living so tough? So tiring?
I mean, every single thing seems so meaningless now. I can jump out of the window right this second and it really wouldn’t matter to me.

I know what you’re thinking and I also know that you have a lot to say but I know all of that. I do. I always thought one’s purpose in life is to grow and staying content is the most important thing. And that the way we perceive the things life throws at us, matters a hell lot. Yes, I know that but now nothing makes sense.

I wish to bounce back soon.
And sorry for the super gloomy post.


Shreya said...

its really is. but there isn't a way out :)

The Bald Guy said...

You jumping out of the window would matter to me. Unless the window is on the ground floor and is about two feet from the ground. Any higher than would risk your life and we don't want such a pretty young lady to die anytime soon.

RIP friend.

sulagna ™ said...

apart from TBG's humour...cheer up ...look we will meet this weekend ha :)

Ria said...

death does bring gloom with itself, so dont feel sorry...its good that u let out ur feelings here...hope u r feeling better now. *hugs*

malpani.!! said...

sorry for your loss...
life's gonna shine soon.. :)
Be well..!!

Harini said...

Deaths do that to you... they make u question everything. I just hope you feel better soon :)

Somak said...

I know how you feel, I lost a friend to cancer two years back.
As for the rest of your post, I guess the more you think about life and how difficult, unfair and useless it is, the less you'll want to live it.
Just focus on the good times, and believe it or not, there is a way out from the stereotypical lifestyle you've written about. I know such people and they do exist. So don't let life ruin your life.

Siddhesh 'Ravan' Kabe said...

He has gone beyond our reach to contact. But that doesn't mean he is gone forever.

May his soul rest in peace.

buckingfastard said...

"nobody said it was easy
no one even said it would be so hard"


Shruti said...

Oh That's really heart breaking! I hope you heal soon..take care girl.

Nipun said...

May his soul rest in peace..
Take care of urself..
Even i lost a friend about an year ago.
There are things for which we can't do anything..


nil said...

RIP your friend.
Bless him. My salutes to him, for he was a fighter I'm sure.

Sweetheart,I know you're upset. And I'm not going to ask you to grow out of it,cause I know how you feel.
All I'd say is,you're going to bounce back. Very soon. And when you do, you'll figure the reason why life is worth it. You won't need us to answer it :)

We love you :)

Miss Sunshine said...

hey friend,
You'll be fine. That's the cycle of life. Just take care. :)

Miss Sunshine said...

and follow your whims.. the rainbow..the sunshine.. :)

AW said...

I'm very sorry to hear about your friend... it must be a very difficult time right now. I've never found it easy to make sense of things following the loss of my father (also from cancer) but I'm hoping it gets easier with time. All you can do is support those around you and yourself. Oh and please don't jump out of any windows... life is a gift and you will figure out things when you need to.

Stay strong.

Anish Patel said...

His soul rest in peace....
Take care of urself....

Darshan Chande said...

I just love the way you put down your thoughts into words, Orange. So much clarity you have in expressing your thoughts.

I mean, every single thing seems so meaningless now. I can jump out of the window right this second and it really wouldn’t matter to me. - How sensible!

haathi said...

thats tough. i hope youre alright now..

All of us are stars and deserve the right to twinkle ♥